Public Speaking

Posted on November 22, 2007 in Motivation by byronb

Whether it’s a small meeting at work or school, a speech at a family or social event, or a large public presentation or address: almost everybody has had or will have the experience of speaking in public at some point in their lives. And for most people, this relatively safe and un-perilous act poses the greatest fear in them.

It happens to everyone in a perceived crisis situation: the stress response - muscles tighten, mouth gets dry, stomach churns, palms sweat. Up in the spotlight, all eyes on you, public speaking connotes just such a crisis, with the same stress response symptoms - shallow breathing, heart racing, weakened bladder control, hot flashes, etc.

If ths sounds like you too, read on and discover tried-and-true methods for overcoming and eliminating your fear of public speaking.

Don’t memorize the speech; memorize the main ideas. Memorizing your speech word for word keeps you locked in a rigid mental pattern that makes every word out of your mouth dependent on remembering the word before it. What if you don’t remember a sentence, or skip a whole paragraph? Forget a line or lose your place and you could wind up stammering nonsensically and feeling like a fool while you try founderingly to get yourself back on track. And if you bring a printed copy of their speech up there with you, then you only wind up squinting and fumbling around through your text to find where you left off and what comes next. How stressful is that!

Reading or reciting a speech verbatim sounds awkward and disingenuous, it creates a barrier between you and your audience (more on breaking that barrier and developing “rapport” in a moment), and it causes undue stress.

Instead, just memorize the main ideas of your speech. Learn the material you’re speaking about, not so much the words you’ve scripted to discuss them. Instead of carrying a printed speech up to the podium with you, carry a bunch of numbered index cards, with one single main idea on each. This way, you project a confidence in your material and a natural, personable, comfort and ease of manner in talking about it that comes from letting the words pour out of your mouth naturally, conversationally, as you broach each new main idea in turn.

Build rapport. It means ‘relatedness’, a feeling of connection with another person. There are several ways to do this:

Eye-contact - Instead of trying to look at your entire audience with one broad-sweeping gaze, as if it was a single-minded organism, make eye contact with individual members of the audience throughout your speech. Speaking as if directly to one person at a time not only makes the entire audience feel more comfortable and your speech feel more intimate, but it alleviates great stress in you, the speaker, imagining yourself talking to one person at a time and not a dozen or 500.
Hands free - Instead of gripping the podium, table, easel, your notes, etc., keep your hands free. If you don’t gesture with your hands when you talk, don’t worry about it; just let your arms dangle at your sides. This may feel awkward to you at first, if you’re not used to it, but it’s actually a more relaxed position than tensely gripping a foreign object for strength, support, and comfort. And to the audience loose arms and free hands comes across making you seem relaxed, confident, and open.
Humor - Break the ice; tell a joke. Make a slip of the tongue or get interrupted by something unexpected and beyond your control? Consider making a funny comment about it before going on; acknowledging the unplanned occurrence that everybody certainly noticed relieves the audience’s momentary stress and discomfort as well as your own.
Personalize - Lastly, and on the same note, include at least one personal story or example in your talk. There’s always a way to work something personal into any subject. It helps people relate to a topic more when they see it applied to someone’s life; it helps people relate to you more when it’s your experience you’re relating. You’re human, they’re human; be human. It’s endearing.