Signs of Low Self Esteem

Posted on December 2, 2007 in Motivation by byronb

Do you suffer from low self-esteem? Do your children or students? Your friends, colleagues, employees? Do you know? How would you? Many of us aren’t even aware of whether we or someone we know suffers from low self-esteem. We have nothing to compare it to. No point of reference. Nobody ever talks about it.

Well no longer. We’re talking about it: you and I, right here, right now. Below are the signs you can look for identifying self-esteem issues in others, as well as in yourself.

Physical Signs

A person’s posture, chronic habits, and physical demeanor are all rife with body language cues that indicate their degree of self-worth.

Chronic and quite often unconscious body-language that conveys a lack of self-confidence include:

Shoe-gazing - looking down instead of straight in front of you
Avoiding eye contact
Nervous shaking, twitching, and fidgeting
Shallow breathing
Stiffness, rigidity, physical tension

By the same token, these physical states can also contribute to a deficit of self-worth. Every bit as much as they indicate how you feel about yourself, breathing shallowly, gazing at your shoes, and shaking nervously all influence how you feel about yourself also.

This means that you don’t even need to “convince” yourself of anything to affect a positive change in your self-esteem. You can just rein in those unconscious behaviors - whenever you think about it, just choose to breathe deeply, look up and in front of you, and bring your shaking body parts to stillness - and start to notice a change in how you feel.

Mental/Emotional, and Social Signs

These are a bit harder to “see” because they’re situational, rather than physical, signs. They require staying keen to a person’s patterns of behavior. Are you or someone you know:

Socially withdrawn
Driven to anxiety by the thought of social interaction
Awkward in social settings
“Checking out”, drifting off, getting “spacey”, having trouble staying present
Sad, depressed
Rebellious, angry, spiteful
Exhibiting signs of an eating disorder
Extremely negative, critical, contrary in attitude
Unable to accept constructive criticism or a compliment
Hard on yourself, prone to beating yourself up
Preoccupied with what other people think
Neglecting your basic needs - health, hygiene
Lazy, lackadaisical, lethargic, hesitant to take on new challenges
Wracked by guilt
Doubtful and mistrustful of yourself, your own thoughts and abilities
Prone to low expectations, lacking in hope for the future,

Knowledge is power. Once you’re able to identify a need for yourself or someone you love to develop greater self-esteem, you’re already on the road to making it happen.